Tag Archives: Relationships

Lost

13 Wednesday Jan 2016

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Lost…

Ms Mandi Photo 1

Yesterday he left again. Sadly to say, I allow him to come and go at his leisure. This isn’t my intention; however, it is the result of my lack of courage to go on without him.

I figured it takes me about four weeks to fully recover from his presence, or more like his absence. Subsequently, this does not last long, for he always comes back to disrupt my sense of normalcy.

Once again, I am left to clean up the fragments of my dysfunctional life.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright: December 4, 2011

Excerpt from A Walk to Barrow Hill

16 Wednesday Dec 2015

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A Walk to Barrow Hill:

The house appeared to be dark. Every shade in the house had been drawn. An uncomfortable chill crept up her leg, causing her to shutter.

She felt an eerie feeling encircling her as she called out.

“Mama, it’s Anna. Are you home?”

Silence filled the voided spaces of the empty rooms.

“Mama are you okay? Rose asked me to come over and check on you.”

Anna entered room after room, quietly shutting the doors behind her as she left.

The bathroom was the only room she hadn’t come to yet. Cautiously she peeked around the corner, slowly opening the door.

“Mama!” Anna didn’t recognize her own voice, as a ghostly scream escaped her before collapsing to the stone-cold tile floor.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright: December 2015

Happy Birthday Mandi…

07 Monday Sep 2015

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Happy Birthday Mandi…I still miss you every day!

Mandi in Venice Beach 0994

Who really is Ask Ms Mandi? A picture says a thousand words. RIP Mandi September 2005. Mandi was my devoted, lovable, and faithful Staffordshire Bull Terrier.

We had 12 wonderful years with her before she passed away from jaw cancer. It was one of the hardest things to watch as our sweet dog starting dying in front of our eyes, knowing we could do nothing to save her.

I know, you’re probably thinking, a dog….. inspired you, but she did. My boyfriend at the time bought her for me when she was only 5 weeks old, we had to bottle feed her for the first couple weeks of her life. I guess you could say that she was our first-born; after all, she was bottle fed.

Subsequently, she was the cutest, fattest puppy that I had ever seen. She instantly became my heart. A dog’s love and devotion is unconditional, without judgement. Why wouldn’t she be my inspiration for this WEBSITE?

Written & Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright September 2015

Dear Daddy…

25 Tuesday Aug 2015

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Ms Mandi Photo 1

Dear Daddy…it’s me. I haven’t seen you in a while. I miss you…why don’t you ever call me? Why don’t you write to me? It’s okay, I understand. I know you have other things to think about…more important things.

I was thinking…do you remember when I was a little girl and I couldn’t wait for you to get home from work? It felt like I waited all day for you to return home. I was so proud of you. I knew you loved me because you went to work to give me things. You told me this.

You bought me a bike, clothes, and you even built me a swing to play on. This was my favorite present because you made it out of love and it hung from my favorite tree in the backyard.

That was special. I felt so loved and knew you loved me. But then I grew up and things started to change. You and mommy started to argue all the time and you would storm out of the house mad, staying away for days.

Then one day, you didn’t come home anymore. Mommy said you wouldn’t be living with us anymore, but that you still loved me and always would. She explained that adult problems were not my problem and that you loved me even if you weren’t going to live with us anymore.

I believed her and I believed you, but you lied. You say we gave up on you, but in reality, you gave up on us…on me. You lied to me…but like I said, I understand. Do you know why? I understand because love is forgiving and you are my daddy and always will be…I just wished you knew this and tried to love me…just a little.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright August 2015

Today’s Quote

07 Friday Aug 2015

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Today’s Quote:

Ms Mandi Photo 1

Sometimes it’s better to be alone,
than to live in chaos.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright 2015

Sometimes All We Have Are Our Memories

14 Sunday Jun 2015

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Sometimes all we have are our memories…

Ms Mandi Photo 1

Beauty fades.

People come and go.

Our children grow up, making their own way in life.

But we will always have our memories.

Memories of our childhood.

Memories of our family.

Memories of our experiences.

Memories of our journeys.

Today I had a chance to walk down memory lane. I had the opportunity to remember my grandparents. Oh, how I miss them. I think of them everyday. But without the photographs, I would not be able to remember their smiling faces or would I be able to share them with my children. They would have been just a thought from my memory.

But now they are once again reliving in my mind and through my children’s minds.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Early Morning Bliss

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

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Early Morning Bliss…
Ms Mandi Photo 1

Gently stirring, but not fully awake or even ready to wake up for the day, Jamie wondered. It was only five in the morning, but yet birds were up and singing. She didn’t only hear one soft melody, but an entire orchestra of magical music. It was simply amazing.

These little wonders in the world is what made life so precious, Jamie thought, yawning.

Happiness enveloped her, but not too soon. Just as quickly, she remembered. Her stomach grumbled. Her head ached. As quickly as the bliss had circuited her, it just as slowly began to disappear like a soft flowing breeze.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Why do I miss you…

05 Thursday Feb 2015

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Why do I miss you?

Ms Mandi Photo 1

I miss our late night talks.

I miss how you used to tell me I was beautiful.

I miss how you would look at me with a smile in your eyes.

I miss my best friend.

I miss holding your hand.

I miss your soft kisses.

But I don’t miss your mean spirit.

Love is about how you feel about yourself while you are with that special person, if you are broken then you can not love.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Why did you make me do it…

10 Saturday May 2014

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Why did you make me do it…

Ms Mandi Photo 1

He yells at you. He throws things at you. He raises his hand to you. You cry out and ask “Why?”

He says, ” I love you so much…why do you make me do it?”

You question yourself. “Did I make him mad? What did I say? I am to blame.”

You are not to blame. Love does not hurt and this is not your fault.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Silent Abuse

03 Saturday May 2014

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Silent Abuse…

Ms Mandi Photo 1

I recently read a post on Face Book regarding how abuse comes in many forms. I would have to agree. Abuse may be silent, vulgar name calling, throwing things at a person, mind manipulation, mental punishments, pushing, cheating, withholding affection, and breaking their spirit.

At first it is silent, but as the years pass, each act of violence destroys a persons’ self-confidence and pride. They began to feel worthless and hopeless. They believe what their abusers are telling them; they are a piece of crap. And one day, the silent abuse becomes physical.

Until that one day, when the one being abused stands up to the abuser and says, STOP! I will not take this anymore and I am worth it!

Stand up for yourself and fight back, I did.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi