Tag Archives: Hope

A Walk up Barrow Hill

18 Wednesday Nov 2015

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A Walk up Barrow Hill…

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Anna sat frozen on the couch, staring aimlessly at the corner of the wall. Her stomach roared with hunger pangs, but she no longer felt the discomfort.

It felt numb to her now. She felt numb.

Wishing she felt nothing for the endless craving, that ate at her very soul each and every day. She longed to forget.

Anna closed her eyes; taking in a deep breath to control her desires. It was no use. She was at its mercy.

Feeling defeated, she quickly, but cautiously entered the kitchen. She knew she would regret this. She made a mental note to take a trip into town to purchase another package, before her mother got home and noticed them missing.

Slowly and then eagerly, she ripped open the package of cookies, shoving them effortlessly into her mouth. Within minutes, she had consumed the entire package.

Feeling defeated, she slumped to the floor, as tears spilled down her checks. She knew she had failed once again.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright: November 2015

Excerpt from A Walk to Barrow Hill

24 Thursday Sep 2015

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A Walk to Barrow Hill…

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Silently, I let out a silent gasp or was it silent, by the way my daddy intently turned around, facing me and staring me down. All the while, Rose had not loosened up on her grip…not since we entered the hospital.

But now, as we stood in Mommy’s doorway, listening to the her machines peeping…I lost all my nerve. Tears, simultaneously sprang to my eyes, as I watched my mother’s lifeless body lying so quiet and still in the sterile bed.

Prying Rose’s had from mine, I ran. I ran down the hall, until I could run no more, falling down against the wall, out of breath and sobbing.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright 2015

Always Remembering 911

10 Thursday Sep 2015

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Always Remembering 911…

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September 11, 2001.  I remember the day as if it were yesterday.  I remember walking into my house around 8:30 am, turning on the television, and watching in horror as the second airplane crashed into the Twin Towers.

The thing that struck me most odd that morning was watching the individual white sheets of paper flutter around the streets of New York, thousands and thousands of paper.  I remembered thinking who had touched them, who had just recently stored them into the filing system, who was missing them?  It was an eerie thought to wonder about these thousands of sheets of papers coming from the Twin Towers.  I do not know why this particular image has stayed in my mind for all these years, but it has.  Perhaps my mind needed to fixate onto something less horrific than watching a city fall apart to an awful bout of terrorism.  The images we endured that day will forever be stuck in our minds.

September 11th is a very special and memorable day to my family and I because we named our second daughter after a Naval Contractor who had died on September 11th in the Pentagon.  We named her Julian Cooper.  She reminds us every year on 911 of the loss, we as individuals, families, and as a nation, had to endure on that fateful day fifteen years ago on September 11, 2001.

WE WILL NEVER FORGET!

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright September 11, 2012

Signs Are All Around Us

19 Friday Jun 2015

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Signs are all around us…

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Have you ever heard of the saying, “There are signs all around us?” Of course we have, but how much merit to do we really put towards this saying…

Today started out like any other day, but it started to go down hill quickly by mid-morning. Lately I’ve been at a cross-road in my life. Both romantically and financially. My career as a writer is at a stand-still, but I’m keeping my head up; starting up a new book. This is always a journey…the ideas for the new story are in your head, but putting it down on paper, leads to somewhat of a challenge.

Needless to say, I was starting to doubt myself….I decided to get up and get some fresh air, when I saw something glistening on the floor in my office. I bent down to see what it was and picked it up. It was a pin. It read, “Make it happen.” Make it happen, I thought. How perfect!

I don’t know how this pin got there, but I took it as a sign. Don’t get frustrated with your current situation and give up, but make it happen!

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Excerpt from “A Walk to Gallow Hill”

19 Thursday Jun 2014

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“A Walk to Gallow Hill”

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Abigail could not remember a time when she had felt more alone. She tried not to think about it, the betrayal, but it was a reality and it was happening to her. Her life had been perfect. She wondered how her husband was doing?

A single tear slowly slide down her flushed cheek. She hadn’t been feeling well lately, but this was expected. Her face felt flushed as she slowly brushed a strand of her hair from across her face.

The footsteps startled her from her gentle thoughts of a better time. She tried not to remember where she was, but it was hard as she heard the keys rattle in the lock. Quietly, she said a prayer as she felt the stirring inside of her belly.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Going Back to Work…

21 Sunday Jul 2013

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Going Back to Work

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Going to work after two years…

When I first got laid off in July 2011, I never imagined I would be out of work for almost, exactly, two years. When I first got laid off, I was excited to have time off to do what I wanted to do. I decided to write my second book, Julian’s Voice: A Ruby in the Rough. I planned a year to complete my manuscript. I was lucky enough to have unemployment during that time.

A year later and I had my completed manuscript, Julian’ Voice: A Ruby in the Rough. I was so excited. I continued to search for the perfect agent for my work, as I started looking for full-time employment as an Accountant. I knew having a Master’s Degree would make my search that much easier. Oh… how wrong I was.

It took me another year to finally find the perfect job, that I liked and that paid what I was expecting to be paid.

It has been a two-year process from start to finish. I never expected to be out of work for so long, especially with the kind of education that I have.

My point is…stay focused, driven, and hopeful. Perseverance really does pay off. Continue to fight for what you believe in and in what you want. I now have the perfect job…now all I have to find is the perfect publisher for my manuscript. It shouldn’t be so hard…

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi

Girl You are Amazing

16 Tuesday Oct 2012

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I normally write about others and their situations, but today I am going to write something raw. 

I drag myself out of bed at seven in the morning, only to stare at my reflection in the bathroom mirror, for longer than I originally planned.  It seems that some days are harder to get out of bed than other days and I am amazed that I even bother trying.  

I am starting to feel the fist signs of anxiety.  My stomach is churning into knots for some unknown reason.  Panic engulfs me.  I am scared.  I have gone through so much pain and change this past year and wonder how I can go on.  It would be so simple to just check out, but that is an impossible consideration.  I have people who love me and count on me.  I could not leave them behind to endure this life without me.  I am grateful for the people around me, who love me because there are so many others that want to take me down. 

As humans, we grow so attached to our possessions that we forget that our possessions mean nothing to the people who love us, if we were to check out.  Today, I broke down from the weeks’ stresses, wanting to give up, crying for all the unfairness that life has bestowed upon my family and I. 

Then my best friend, in the whole world, dropped what he was doing, to come over to my house.  Hearing his knock, I opened the door, as black tears streamed down my cheeks.  He said nothing, but walked into the foyer, pulling me into his arms, holding me while I cried.  He said that no material possession was more important than I am.  That without me, what importance would any material possession have to shine greater than me. 

When you are feeling lost and like you cannot go on, just remember that you can always buy a new house or car.  You can always get a new job, but you can never get another “YOU”. 

Written By:  Ask Ms Mandi