Category Archives: Authors of the Week

Excerpt from Manuscript – SNOW

29 Friday Jul 2016

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EXCERPT FROM MANUSCRIPT – SNOW

REDWOODS 07.29.2016

Reluctantly, she continued brushing her long blonde hair. She knew what was in store for her this evening. She had been anticipating this moment for some time. At first, she had been excited and vigorously her excitement had turned to a worrisome anxiety.

She smiled into the mirror, realizing she looked as perfect as a human-being could look. She had always been called beautiful, but she hadn’t seen it, not until this very moment.

Her eyes sparkled. Her skin was flawless. Her hair shinned under the dim lighting. The only thing missing was her smile. She tried smiling at herself, but what came back to her through her reflection was nothing more than a solace, grim, stare.

She thought to herself, “What if he doesn’t feel the same way? What if she had changed. She knew he had changed, but what if no longer loved her?”

She knew she would surely die of a broken heart, but seriously, who really did that.

“January, you are a silly girl, very silly indeed!”

It always amazed her how quickly her self-doubt appeared, even as she stood in front of the full-length mirror admiring her beautiful red-satin Armani dress.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright July 2016

My Tears Fall…

27 Wednesday Jul 2016

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My Tears Fall…

SISTERS 07.2015

When you trip,
my tears fall.

When you hurt,
my tears fall.

When you cry,
my tears fall.

When you scream out for help,
my tears fall.

When you want to end it all,
my tears fall.

When you don’t understand,
my tears fall.

When you reach out to me,
I shed no more tears and hold you close to my heart.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi

Excerpt from Manuscript Snow

09 Saturday Jul 2016

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SNOW

IMG_4487

Dear Diary:

Casually watching my foot steps leaving the softest of impressions in the sand, making me ponder over my life and the choices I had made. I had been called co-dependent before, but hadn’t fully understood the meaning behind it. Surely, I wasn’t the one with the problem. I wasn’t the addict.

I was normal, I had followed all the rules. I was a good girl, growing up in a well-to-do family in the suburbs, eating most my vegetables, attending church on Sundays, not talking back to my elders, graduating from high school and eventually graduating from college with honors and two Masters’ Degrees to show for all my hard work. I was the one following all the rules. I am not the one with the problem.

But, today my therapist told me a different ending. I was just like the addict, I was addicted to covering up for the addict. I was trying to save him. I loved him and to be honest with myself, I loved him more than I loved me. Just like an addict loves their drug of choice more than themselves, more than their wife, more than their mother, and more than their children. They would die for their addiction, just like I would have died for you.

But I’m not the addict, you are.

January set down her pen, reaching for the box of tissues, as the tears streamed down her face. Today had been one of the hardest days of her life and probably ever to come again. She had to say good-bye to Jack, he would kill her if she let him. He was drowning and pulling her down into the current with him.

But she was a survivor, she was stronger than he. She had the will to fight and gain back the control she had relinquished on the day she had accepted his drug addiction, thinking she could save him and not knowing she couldn’t, but no more. She wanted to live and she knew now that she must face these demons on her own and without Jack.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright July 9, 2016

CHILDHOOD GAMES

05 Tuesday Jul 2016

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“childhood games”

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

6/1/16

rock, paper, scissors, shoot!

rock:
weigh your life down
a sad dark stone, crushing

paper:
to drain your thoughts on
making you empty

scissors:
sharp, dangerous
cut your life non-existent

shoot:
the bullet goes through my heart
what I say when I wake up alive

-jcw “childhood games”
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi

Excerpt from Manuscript – Snow

29 Wednesday Jun 2016

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Excerpt from SNOW

photo (9)

He was waiting for her, as she pulled up. She pretended not to notice him sitting on the grass in front of her apartment, but she felt his gaze burning a hole through her soul.

She thought if she looked down, playing with the callous on the palm of her hand, he would get bored and look away, but when she raised her head, peeking up and over her lashes, she caught his intent stare.

His eyes were black…black as the night.

She knew he was mad, but she didn’t care, well maybe a little, but not really. What the hell did he have to be mad with her anyway. She was the one who should be mad.

After all, he was the one who had broken up with her. Maybe she had broken up with him, but he had deserved it. He was going down a path she didn’t approve, nor did she wish to partake.

“Did you think I would just go away?”

“Jack, I’m too tired to deal with this right now, besides your high.”

“Damn it January. You always say that, but I’m not. I quit using, just like you asked me to.”

“That’s bullshit, Jack and you know it! And the least you can do is to tell the truth, for once in your life.”

“Maybe, I just did a little.”

“Exactly! Like I said, goodnight Jack.” She ran up the stairs, quickly looking down at him. She didn’t want him to see her tears, but it was too late.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright June 29, 2016

Excerpt from Manuscript – Snow

26 Sunday Jun 2016

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Excerpt from SNOW:

8th Grade Dance 006

The sun was beginning to set behind the grayish-blue, Sierra Mountains. The murmurs of the afternoon voices continued to echo in her ears.

It had been an eventful afternoon, but January was exhausted. She had waited twelve years for this day and now it had finally come and gone, as if in a blink.

“Congratulations Young Lady.” Her grandpa extended out his shaky hand, suffering from chronic arthritis for most of his adult life, but obviously proud of his only grandchild.

“Thank you, Grandpa. I’m so happy you and Grandma were able to make it.”

“We wouldn’t have missed your graduation from high school…not in a million years.”

January smiled, politely dismissing herself.

She was distracted. She hadn’t seen Jack since the ceremony ended, almost thirty minutes earlier.

As she wondered out to the parking lot, she heard a car’s brakes screeching. She held her breath, waiting in anticipation for the final part, the sound of metal as it crashed into another car, or the thud the car made as it hit something or someone. She waited with batted breath, but nothing.

She relaxed, letting her breath out. Suddenly out of nowhere she heard footsteps coming up behind her.

Startled, she turned around, ready to scream out…”Jack! what they hell! You scared me to death. Where have you been…”

She didn’t finish her sentence, as he pulled her roughly into him, passionately kissing her with all the desire and wanting he had building up inside of him.

“I love you baby…that’s all I wanted to tell you.” Quickly extending his arm forward, revealing the most gorgeous dozen red roses she had ever seen.

“Oh, Jack! They’re beautiful and so are you. I love you too…more than words!”

“You can prove it to me tonight. Now go home and get pretty for me. I’ll see you tonight at eight.”

January watched with a smile upon her lips, as he ran down the street, jumping back into his white 1967 Camaro, that he had left idling in the middle of the street, and took off in a hurry down Main Street.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright July 26, 2016

Excerpt from Manuscript – Snow

19 Sunday Jun 2016

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Excerpt from SNOW

photo (7)

Where was Jack, January thought.

She was starting to panic. He promised her they wouldn’t stay long, but as always, that promise had been broken.

As she walked for the front door, slowly the bathroom door opened. Jack stood there in the middle of a cloud of smoke, looking at January stunned, with a look of agitation on his face. His friend Bill sheepishly looked at January, before shifting his gaze down to his feet.

“What the hell, Jan? Why are you always sneaking up on me…stop suffocating me and stop being such a bitch!”

“A bitch? What are you talking about. I was just looking for you. You promised me that we would only have to stay for a few hours, to watch the rest of the game. The game is over and I want to go, besides you are wasted and doing God knows what in the bathroom.”

“Don’t worry about what I’m doing and stop being my mother. I thought I told you that…I don’t like you being my mother. Screw this! Bill and I are going to get more beer.” Jack snapped.

“What are you talking about Jack? I want to go…you promised!”

“Like I said Jan, Bill and I are going out to get more beer and then we will go.”

An anger rose up in January that she didn’t know she had. She had a enough. “Jack, I’m going home!”

Slamming the front door, she ran to her car, as tears streamed down her face.

How dare he treat her like that. She was sick of feeling like this. Jack was quickly dragging her down with him. She had to fight back.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright June 19, 2016

Excerpt from The Lost Diary of Jane Doe

13 Monday Jun 2016

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THE LOST DIARY OF JANE DOE:

Humboldt County 03_edited-1

Youth is symmetrical to innocence.
Therefore, hate is a simile of violence.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright September 12, 1995

THE LOST DIARY OF JANE DOE

08 Wednesday Jun 2016

Posted by in Authors of the Week, The Lost Diary of Jane Doe

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THE LOST DIARY OF JANE DOE:

Mt Whitney Labor Day 2014

Sometimes I sit on the beach watching the world go by,
wondering why I feel the emptiness I do.

Shouldn’t someone only feel sad if they had just cause to do so,
or does our mind play tricks on us.

Is there actually something out there that justifies such feelings,
sometimes I wonder.

Perhaps our conscious mind does not allow us to see all that we can see,
but our hearts can’t help but feel.

However, if there is no cause,
how sad would that leave us.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi

Copyright: February 10, 1994

Excerpt from Manuscript – Snow

01 Wednesday Jun 2016

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Excerpt from Manuscript – Snow

Jewels & Bowz 3 - 05.30.2016

The girl who was wearing all black was staring at her. She didn’t want to look over at her, but she could feel the heaviness of her glare boring down on her. She sensed the girl was trying to get her attention, but January was lost in between the lyrics of the band screaming from the radio and the shouting she heard in the other room.

She decided to look her way, “Do you know when they will be out of the bedroom?”

“Who knows. They made a big score tonight…could be a while.”

“A score?” January didn’t know what this girl was talking about.

“Speed, of course.” The girl casually replied.

January was shocked. “Did you see Jack go into the room. He must have gone out for more beer.”

“Jack is the cute guy with longish, shoulder length hair and black eye-liner?”

“Yes, he’s my boyfriend, but he doesn’t use drugs, so I’m sure he must have slipped out when I didn’t notice.”

“No, he’s in there. I saw him and the tall, skinny guy go in together.”

The room started to spin…January wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or the loud music or the distaste of her dinner rising up and into her throat, but she felt as if she was going to be sick.

Written By: Ask Ms Mandi
Photograph By: Ask Ms Mandi
Copyright June 1, 2016